Beware of the Lure to be Likable

Fishing Lure

I guess I am still not done with the whole “like-ability” discussion.  So, I continue the discussion with a warning to beware of the lure to be likable.

Leaders are often placed under a tremendous amount of pressure to be relatable and to be nice.  Many follow the natural tendency to want to be liked because it feels much easier to be liked than to be viewed as capable and accomplishment driven.

Few leaders want to be the bad guy.  And those that do want to be the “heavy” are not the kind of leader that I am drawn to!

But as leaders we are expected to make the tough decisions that serve the organization or the team’s best interests.  Trying to be too nice can in fact be lazy, inefficient, irresponsible, and harmful to individuals and the organization.

I’ve seen this happen many times in my personal and professional career.  Leaders get almost addicted to a sense of being likable.  They make a mistake in staffing or in a major decision.  This can happen to anyone, and the best way to remedy the situation is to address it quickly. However, despite the obvious solution to the rest of the team, some leaders keep on trying to make it work.

While it is a good thing to follow our instinct to stick to it and be consistent, if you fast forward a few weeks or months, the situation is no better and often worse.

There’s a key lesson here for any leader

Nice is only good when it’s coupled with a rational perspective and the ability to make difficult choices.   Continue reading “Beware of the Lure to be Likable”

The Genesis Model of Creative Leadership

God and Adam

Creative leaders draw the best thinking out of the individual team members before calling a general brainstorming session.

This is the assertion in Chapter 1 of Tom Harper’s book, Leading from the Lion’s Den.  In his book he presents leadership lessons from every book of the Bible.  Consider this one from Genesis:

“In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth.” – Gen 1:1

Many organizations today foster creative teamwork through collaborative instant messaging, chat windows, discussion boards, and project groups.  My company uses a myriad of technology tools as well as recently construction an entire corporate campus to foster collaboration.

Though today’s online cooperation might appear to be a new kind of brainstorming, it is actually based on a tried and true model of creativity. The old standard concept is simple: the best creative thinking is done when individuals have a chance to think before they collaborate.

Not everyone thinks well in groups. The rapid-fire atmosphere of some brainstorming methodologies can be very disconcerting to some otherwise highly creative members of your team. Continue reading “The Genesis Model of Creative Leadership”

Overlooking “Capability”  for “Like-ability” 

Capable - Likeable

One of the biggest problem that I see in many organizations is our willingness to overlook “capability” for “like-ability.”

What does that mean?

It means that many times we are more interested in whether or not our leader is “like-able” and less interested in whether or not they are actually capable of exhibiting and demonstrating leadership.  This can have tragic affects

This phenomenon is not as common in the commercial world.  The business world often cares much more about whether or not you can do the job than whether or not you can be a leader.  There is not often much thought given to how the rest of the employees “feel” about the boss or the leader.

Here is where we see leaders who have progressed through the ranks of an organization and have reached a leadership level through hard work, dedication and a proven track record of success.  They have been mentored by other leaders who have proven track records of success.  They sometimes just aren’t that like-able.  And they often don’t particularly care if they are liked.

To back that premise up, research shows that average Emotional Intelligence scores plummet higher up the corporate ladder beyond the supervisor level. The theory is that people get promoted based upon results, even if their people skills are lacking. As leadership coaches, folks like me are working desperately to change that. But the phenomenon remains.

And I suppose all of this begs a few questions:

  1. Would a leader rather be liked or trusted?
  2. Would a leader rather be popular or right?
  3. Would a leader rather be successful or loved?
  4. Is “like-ability” even something that a leader should be concerned about?

There are so many angles that this thought process could take.

What if . . .

Continue reading “Overlooking “Capability”  for “Like-ability” “

Strategic Leadership’s Distinct Roles

Distinct Roles

I have spent a great deal of time in my last few articles camping out on the subject of strategic leadership.  We have examined the ancient roots of it.  We have also looked at the circle of leadership.

In this article I want to bring the topic to a close and look at some of the distinctive roles that strategic leaders must fulfill.  Consider if you will these seven distinct roles for strategic leaders.

Providing Direction — The word “leadership” derives from an Anglo-Saxon word, laed, which means “road, path, track or the course of a ship at sea.” Leaders provide the directional guidance for their followers.  Further, they ensure that everyone is moving the the proper direction.  Just moving is not enough.  We must be moving in the right direction.

Thinking and Planning — Strategic leaders decide the direction through strategic thinking and planning. They go on to develop the best strategy to guide your processes, and then they implement it. Thinking and planning without an ability to execute is ultimately worthless. Continue reading “Strategic Leadership’s Distinct Roles”

Is Self-Esteem Affecting Your Leadership?

Self-Esteem

Leadership is as much about emotions as it is about skills. You can easily gain a working knowledge of leadership and all the “actions” necessary to make you an effective leader by taking courses and by reading books.

However, knowing them and applying them are two different things.

Often, our personal leadership is affected, not so much by what we don’t know how to do, but by what we are unwilling to do. And being unwilling to do the hard things required of a leader is often caused by fear and lack of self-esteem.

Self-esteem has two components: It is made up largely of how we see ourselves and how we see others.

First, let’s look at how we see ourselves. – By definition, self-esteem is about how we esteem ourselves.  In other words, it is about how we see ourselves and feel about ourselves when we look in the mirror every morning.

Second, it is about how we see others. – But even that is really a reflection of how we see ourselves.  If we envision everyone around us as being smarter or better qualified than we are, then that is perhaps not a reflection of their skills being greater as much as viewing our own skills as being lesser.  Size is a relative thing.  And if we don’t feel we measure up, everyone tends to look bigger in our own eyes.

Self-esteem has an impact upon how we think, how we feel, how we perform, and our results. It is not a stretch to then say that if the results you are getting from your team do not match your expectations, then possibly the problem may not be with your team.  The problem may involve your self-image, your view, and your approach to leadership.

A strong leader must take a good look at their self-image and be introspective enough to consider how our behaviors impact our team.

The following behaviors just may be a signal that your self-esteem is preventing you from effectively leading.

Continue reading “Is Self-Esteem Affecting Your Leadership?”

Three Circles of Leadership

Three Circles

A few weeks ago I took a look at the ancient roots of strategic leadership.  In case you missed that article, click here and you can get up to speed with my stream of thought that leads us to today’s article.

Socrates observed similarities between businesspeople and generals. Socrates was convinced that a meaningful parallel existed in a businessperson’s focus on profit and loss and the military general’s focus on victory and defeat.

In order be successful as a strategic leader, you must first understand your responsibilities as a strategic leader.  Picture, if you will,  three interlocking circles: “Task, Team and Person.” Each circle represents an “area of need” that you must master, and each skill contains proficiencies that overlap with the others.  Consider these three: Continue reading “Three Circles of Leadership”

Stability and Leadership – Are They Related?

Stability and Leadership

I have recently begun hanging around some entrepreneurs in an effort to learn from these folks about how to build something tangible from just a dream and and some drive.  These guys (and one gal) are inspiring to me.  My hope is that they will help me grow Leadership Voices beyond my own personal abilities.

There are many management philosophies out there and they have many followers that would state that stability in and of itself is actually non-entrepreneurial. Here are some common expressions that may be familiar to you:

  • Always question what you have.
  • Don’t follow the rules.
  • If you don’t take the risk, you will never succeed.

Although I agree with the spirit of all these statements in general, I disagree with the typical or traditional interpretation of their intent. All these actually imply one very important and often overlooked pice of advice. The underlying theme of all these maxims should be that your goal is be to be performing continuous improvements to the process. But, unfortunately, the above statements are usually taken too literally and that is a danger for budding entrepreneurs and leaders.

Let’s consider the impact of those statements on my topic for the day. – Stability. Continue reading “Stability and Leadership – Are They Related?”

The Difference Between a Leader and a Master of Ceremony

Emcee

Leaders provide vision and a well-considered direction to reach a common goal. A Master of Ceremonies just announces that it is time to dance.

I run in to a lot of folks who look and act like MCs in my daily activities. But I see very few real leaders. Most of what I see looks more like being a master of ceremonies where the key concern is keeping everyone happy at the party and keeping the proverbial drinks flowing.

Let’s compare and contrast those two individuals for a few moments. What do each of them really do?  And what can we learn from looking at each of them?

Scripts

Masters of Ceremony usually have a script that they are following. The really good ones make everything they do seem as though what they are saying and doing is flowing from a sense of spectacular spontaneity. Pace and humor are very important to a good MC.  Pace and humor are important skills for leaders. But they are the stock and trade of a good MC.

By contrast, leaders don’t always have a script to follow. Or if they do, they are writing it as they go along. Leaders are actually directing the flow of events with their voice, their presence and their example. Continue reading “The Difference Between a Leader and a Master of Ceremony”

Sailing the 7 “C”s of Leadership

Seven Cs of Leadership

I am not a sailor. But I love alliteration in writing and, in addition, it helps me to remember things. So, today, I offer you the following “7 ‘C’s of Leadership”.

These are not the only things that are important to be a real leader. But, if you were to focus on just a few aspects or defining characteristics of a real leader – these would certainly be on the list.

Commitment to the Team – A real leader is committed to the team. They are committed to the entire team and do not play favorites. In fact, a leader’s commitment to the team is of more importance than the team’s commitment to the leader. A leader must be committed and willing to sacrifice for the good of the team and the mission.

Creativity and Freedom – A real leader fosters a sense of creativity and freedom of expression from those around them. Fresh ideas and suggestions are welcomed by a real leader. Long gone are the days of the “Yes Men” that have been constant fixtures of some insecure leaders.

Continue reading “Sailing the 7 “C”s of Leadership”

Loneliness in All Aspects of Leadership

Loneliness in All Aspects of Leadership

“There is a loneliness in all aspects of leadership.”

This is a line from a speech given by a man named Gordon B. Hinckley to a group of students and faculty at Brigham Young University in November of 1969.   I will not debate the theology of that institution. Nor will I debate the incidents that gave rise to Mr. Hinckley making the statements that I find so fascinating. But rather I would ask you to consider the impact of that statement on those of us who would be leaders.

At the point that he delivered this address, BYU was embroiled in a great controversy. For those unaware, the BYU football team had recently been to Laramie, WY to play the University of Wyoming at War Memorial Stadium. Fourteen black football players had planned to wear black armbands as part of their uniform to protest the policy of the LDS church that many considered to be racist. These same fourteen players were dismissed from the team on the evening before the big game.

Now consider some more words from Gordon Hinckley about the loneliness of leadership.

“It was ever thus. The price of leadership is loneliness. The price of adherence to conscience is loneliness. The price of adherence to principle is loneliness. I think it is inescapable. The Savior of the world was a Man who walked in loneliness. I do not know of any statement more underlined with the pathos of loneliness than His statement: ‘The foxes have holes, and the birds of the air have nests; but the Son of man hath not where to lay his head’ (Matthew 8:20).

There is a loneliness in all aspects of leadership. I think we feel it somewhat in this university. BYU is being discussed across the nation today because of some of our practices and some of our policies and some of our procedures, but I would like to offer the thought that no institution and no man ever lived at peace with itself or with himself in a spirit of compromise. We have to stand for the policy that we have adopted. We may wonder in our hearts, but we have to stand on that position set for us by him who leads us, our prophet.”

For the record, the policy that prohibited black males from the priesthood was rescinded in 1978. And one of the top leaders of the church at that time was none other than Gordon Hinckley.

What happened between 1969 and 1978? Many things. Not the least of which was the rapid expansion of the LDS church in South America and a new temple being constructed in Brazil. How would the policy of the day work in such a multi-cultural and multi-racial nation as Brazil? Apparently, the leadership of the church came to the conclusion that the policy was no longer feasible.

What is the point for us as leaders? Continue reading “Loneliness in All Aspects of Leadership”