Leadership Lessons | All About Being "Emotionally Agile"

January 1, 2016

Leaders and Resolutions

Tis the season for many things. Not the least of which is making New Year’s Resolutions. Each of us should consider making some resolutions. And as leaders, here are a few that I think you should consider putting on your list.

Resolve This Year To Be A Better Leader — This one is exceedingly obvious. Yet it is surprising how many leaders are not intentional about developing their leadership skills. So, resolve this year to find some way to increase your leadership skills and abilities. There are so many resources available to help us develop as leaders. Several resources jump to the forefront of my mind at the very thought of leadership development. I am a very big fan of Leadercast and I have been a co-sponsor of one of the local simulcasts here in the Houston area. There are also many books on leadership that can be obtained via Kindle at much lower costs rather than in hard copy. Nearly all of my books are in some eReader format. Just reach out to me if you are looking for resources and I can help you identify some. Continue reading “Leaders and Resolutions”

December 21, 2015

Toughest Leadership Role, Ever!

Consider something for just a moment as we prepare for Christmas this week. Can you imagine a more difficult leadership role than being the earthly father of Jesus Christ? I cannot!

My goal is not to make this article an overtly spiritual one. However, given the Christmas Season and my thoughts at this time of year, some observations and some leadership lessons are unavoidable.

Just who was this man Joseph, the husband of Mary and the adoptive father of Jesus?

We really don’t know a whole lot about him other than what we read in the few places he is mentioned in the New Testament. Traditional Christian narrative and theology state that God chose Joseph to be the earthly father of Jesus. We can read in the Gospel of Matthew, that Joseph was a righteous man. His actions toward Mary, his betrothed wife (fiancé), revealed a great deal about his character. It demonstrates that he was a patient, kind, understanding, and sensitive man. When Mary told Joseph she was pregnant, he had every right to feel disgraced and humiliated. He knew the child was not his.

He had “rights”. Our rights have always been an important thing to us as individuals. Joseph not only had the right to divorce Mary but under Jewish law, she could be put to death.

Joseph’s initial reaction was to break the engagement. This was the culturally and religiously appropriate thing for a righteous man like Joseph to do. However, consistent with his character, he treated Mary with extreme kindness. He did not want to cause her further shame, so he decided to do what needed to be done quietly.

But that is not what happened. Instead, Scripture tells us that God sent an angel to Joseph. It may even have been the same angel that visited Mary to bring her the news that she was going to give birth to Our Lord. This angel verified the same story that Mary had told Joseph and reassured him that his marriage to Mary was still God’s will. In fact, it had been the divine plan all along. It is important not to lose sight of that fact. So, Joseph willingly did as the angel told him, in spite of the public humiliation he would face. Perhaps it was this quality that made him God’s choice for Jesus’ earthly father.

Beyond this and the story of the one time that Jesus was left behind following a pilgrimage to the Temple, the Bible does not reveal much detail about Joseph’s role as a father to Jesus Christ. However, we do know from Matthew 1, that Joseph was an excellent earthly example of integrity and righteousness. We know that Joseph trained Jesus in a very necessary trade of the times — carpentry. It was not glamorous. But, probably no one ever described Joseph in those terms.

Joseph is last mentioned in the Bible when Jesus was 12 years old and they made that annual visit to the Temple in Jerusalem. So really, all we know from written evidence is that Joseph passed on the carpentry trade to Jesus and that he raised him in the Jewish traditions and spiritual observances of the Law.

So, what is the Leadership Lesson here?

Continue reading “Toughest Leadership Role, Ever!”

December 14, 2015

How to lose 20 pounds in 24 hours!

Do you want to know how to lose about 20 pounds in less than 24 hours? If so, read on!

I have recently dropped about 20 pounds and I did it in less than 24 hours. Hard to believe, I know. But it is true. But, just like the late night infomercials that are on TV, you need to read the fine print if you want to know the whole story. I truly have lost the weight. And it has taken less than 24 hours. However, the truth of the matter is that those “24 hours” have been spread out over the last 3 months and were expended in 20-30-minute workout sessions that consisted of running and walking up to 2 and 1/4 miles each time I worked out.

Sorry to disappoint you. I really wish it were easy enough to accomplish in one 24 hour day. But it just doesn’t work that way.

Having said that, losing weight is easier than you think. At the end of the day, it is a mathematical computation. Each pound of fat that you want to lose equals burning about 3500 or 3600 calories MORE than is required for you take in over a period of time. Simply figure out your daily calorie requirement to maintain your current weight and physical activity. Figure out the amount of weight you want to lose. Decide how quickly you want to lose each pound. Then do the math. Subtract your daily intake from your daily requirements to maintain your current weight and take that number of calories and divide it into 3500 calories and the result will be the number of days it will take you to lose that pound of extra weight.

What is the leadership lesson here?

Continue reading “How to lose 20 pounds in 24 hours!”

December 7, 2015

Leadership and Learning to Ride a Bicycle

I admit it. I fell victim to the “Downton Abbey” craze over the last few years. I watched an episode one night out of curiosity. The next thing I knew, I had found Seasons 1 and 2 on Amazon Prime and we watched at least 2 episodes a night for the next 2 weeks until we had seen them all. Then, we went to start watching Season 3 – only this time it wasn’t free on Amazon Prime.

You know you are hooked when you hit the “Buy with 1-Click” button and you shell out the money for the entire 3rd season without even thinking about what it cost. But, I suppose all of that is a subject for another time.

I found the story compelling and the dialog incredible. The characters were fascinating and complex. If you have not seen it, I highly recommend it.

The final season is soon upon us here in the U.S. and I can’t wait.

As good as all of the episodes are, I was captivated by a sentence uttered by a relatively minor character in the last episode of season 3. His name is Shrimpie and he is a husband caught in a loveless marriage and he is the father of a young woman who is rebelling against her parents and against society in general. I am paraphrasing a quote from that episode:

“What I want is for her [his daughter] to know that family can be a loving thing. Love is like riding a bicycle or speaking French. If you don’t learn it young, it’s hard to get the trick of it later.”

I am taking this in a direction that you would expect and I am going to modify the quote to suit my purpose. What if we exchanged the word “love” for “leadership” in the middle sentence of the quote? How apropos is that? I think it is incredibly apropos and worthy of the edit.

“Leadership is like riding a bicycle or speaking French. If you don’t learn it young, it’s hard to get the trick of it later.”

Let me help explain just how that reality manifested itself in my early years. Continue reading “Leadership and Learning to Ride a Bicycle”

November 23, 2015

I am a House Cut

This may be a little out of ordinary for LeadershipVoices.com, but a thought came to me recently. Now that alone is not necessarily “blogworthy”. But, I am going to try to make a leadership application from that thought.

Several years ago I gave up on dealing with my hair. What hair that I had left was not, nor had ever been, very cooperative. It tended to want to go wherever it wanted despite the lotions and potions that I piled on it to keep it down. So, one day, I asked my barber to make a suggestion. She suggested that I just go to a “#1 or #2” razor guard, cut it really short and be done with it. I did it and I loved it.

You can’t imagine the freedom came with that decision. I no longer had to wait in line for my particular barber that remembered how to cut my hair. I now was no longer what barbers call a ”Chair Cut”. I was now a ”House Cut”. All I needed to tell whoever cut my hair was “#1” and they would take it from there.

Simple.

Easy.

In fact, it was liberating.

Now for the application to leadership.

Continue reading “I am a House Cut”

November 16, 2015

Sincere

I have become a huge baseball fan over the past few years. I won’t go into why or how I became a baseball fan so late in life. But, trust me. It’s a good story.

I saw this quote one night a few years ago while skimming the sports news. Apparently, Yadier Molina, the catcher for the St. Louis Cardinals was thrown out for arguing balls and strikes with the home plate umpire Paul Schreiber on that particular night. Now according to the rules of baseball (both the written AND the unwritten ones) you can maybe mutter something under your breath to the umpire. But everyone knows you are going to get tossed out of the game if you argue balls and strikes. And both Molina and his manager Tony La Russa got tossed out of the game that night for doing just that.

But that is not the point of this post. What really struck me was the comments by his manager, Tony La Russa. La Russa knows Yadier Molina well and Molina has a reputation for being competitive, but good to work with from the home plate umpire’s perspective. Here is what La Russa said to the media following the game.

“You try to coach emotion in players, and that’s what competition is about,” La Russa said. “That’s not his style, so evidently he was sincere. And if he’s sincere, what can you say about it?”

Well, I can say a whole lot about it Mr. La Russa!

But what is the Leadership Lesson?

Continue reading “Sincere”

November 9, 2015

Where there’s smoke . . .

We have all heard the maxim — “Where there’s smoke, there’s fire”. But I say that I no longer believe that based upon something that I saw recently while on a business trip to Calgary.

I was looking for a place to eat one night and happened upon a place that I have frequented before. But, because there was a slight chill in the air, there appeared to be a cozy fire burning in the entryway of the restaurant. Just look at the title graphic for this post and you will see the photograph of what I saw.

I could see little wisps of “smoke” rising from the “fire”. It was only after I got to within just a few feet of the “flames” was I able to tell that neither the smoke nor the fire was real. Instead the effect was achieved through the use of ultrasonic technology to create something resembling smoke that was actually water vapor and then adding a flickering flame colored light to create a very realistic smoke and fire effect. I must admit it was very cool.

So what is the Leadership Lesson here?

Continue reading “Where there’s smoke . . . “

November 2, 2015

Weak Leaders

Weak leaders naturally attract weak followers. That is my hypothesis. I am not sure if there has ever been an academic or scientific study to prove that hypothesis or not. But, it is clearly an observation that I have made over many years of observational study.

Why do you suppose that would be the case? And who is really attracted to who? Is it really that it is the weak leader that is attracted to weak followers?

My fear is that it may in reality be the weak leader that is attracted to weak followers. For it is in that setting that they can operate without much fear of any challenges to their leadership or true accountability for their actions.

I have not yet met a leader who would admit to being a weak leader. Often they will admit that they are not as strong as they would like to be. But they usually don’t admit to their weakness in this area.

According to Les McKeown of Inc. Magazine, “The problem comes when a weak leader masquerades as a strong leader. Outwardly, they appear effective, dependable, on top of things. But look closely at what they believe to be strong leadership and what you see is, in fact, a set of dangerous, destructive behaviors. Behaviors which will eventually strangle the organization.”

McKeown goes on to provide some typical behaviors of weak (or in his words, “ineffective”) leaders. I will not elaborate or comment on all of them. But I would offer my thoughts on how weak leaders interact with their followers. Continue reading “Weak Leaders”

October 26, 2015

Emotional Intelligence

Let the record clearly state that I firmly believe that Emotional Intelligence is “All that” and even more. In fact, I have written much on this topic and I remain committed to bringing EI coaching and consulting to those organizations and individuals that want to maximize their potential across all facets of life.

Leaders with high Emotional Intelligence are valued across the board by their organizations. But does that mean that there are no drawbacks or points to ponder where EI is concerned? No, I believe that there are some things to heed in the midst of embracing the benefits.

Many Times It Seems “Feelings-Based”

Effective leaders with high levels of emotional intelligence also often have to achieve a higher level of self-control over their emotions than typical employees. As important as the “gut feeling” that is discussed in much of the commentary on Daniel Goleman’s work is to the basics of EI study, one cannot ignore the connection between the “gut” and the “brain”. In many situations where most employees may get by with a feelings-first approach, leaders must do what’s right rather than what feels good at the moment or is the popular decision to make. Continue reading “Emotional Intelligence”

October 19, 2015

Vision, Foresight, and Observation

Are “vision” and “foresight” the same thing? Or, more importantly, are they synonymous with “leadership”? Let me say quickly that I do not believe that they are synonymous. Consider this as a follow up to last weeks article about a quote that has been attributed to Henry Ford. In that article I called him a “foresighted innovator.” I equated foresighted innovation with being a leader. So, does that mean that Henry Ford was therefore a man of vision? Does that mean that he was a leader by many of the other accepted leadership definitions?

I find myself reflecting this week on a Bible passage that you may hear occasionally when some other types of leaders wish to address their followers. Personally, I have seen it used when church leaders want to speak to the issue of visionary leadership. Here is that often misquoted (and occasionally misused) scripture.

“Where there is no vision, the people perish”.

It is found in the Old Testament in Proverbs 29:18. It is used many times from a church pulpit to exhort us to catch the vision that a pastor has seen and to encourage us onward to the destination that has been seen in the vision.

Having vision, communicating a vision, and catching a vision are all vital skills for leaders and followers alike. But I submit to you that there is a BIG difference between being a visionary person and being a leader.

Let me explain my thoughts this way. Continue reading “Vision, Foresight, and Observation”